1. Some people don't even like the term "Gotcha Day"---I'm not one of them. It seems like a shorthand way of saying, "the day you forever were received into our arms" or "the day we picked you up for forever from the orphanage/transition home/foster home that you had been living at up to this point". Just simpler to say "the day we got you". And in no way are we minimizing the day. We didn't get to go to a store and pick you out and you weren't a prize to be had. We waited a LONG time for this day. We prayed a LONG time for this day. Every adoptive family knows what this day means in their hearts and in the life of their family. The day you changed our lives forever because we got to be your parents full time. The day that God gave you to us to hold forever---finally.
2. Gotcha Day, 99% of the time is not necessarily fun. I made this statistic up, but many that I've talked to describe this day as terribly hard for the newly adoptive parents, for the nannies or foster parents that have been caring for your child for a long time, and especially for the child. Ours wasn't the worst day ever, but it wasn't the easiest either. It was Saturday, so the majority of the House of Hope staff was off work that day. There was a nanny and 2 cooks present when we picked Chloe up. It had been 10 weeks since we had seen her last and we had a "substitute" staff liaison/translator that took us to the home. She brought Chloe in and she immediately started screaming/crying to the point of throwing up. We had to get some information like her eating and sleeping schedule and quickly she fell asleep in Chris' arms---which we believe to be her stress coping mechanism at the time. I stepped down to the lobby to take photos and videos of newly referred kids whose parents were excited to get real pic of video footage of their children.....but even then we wanted to get to our guest house (hotel) and I didn't get to spend a good amount of time with these kids like I would have liked. I maybe spent 10 minutes with them. The substitute was ready to take us to buy formula, Chloe woke up as we changed her into clothes we brought, said bye to the big kids I just photographed, the cooks kissed her and we were on our way. She was crying again and again fell asleep in the back of the car in Chris' arms. [Side note: there are no car seats in Ethiopia and driving is a bit crazy, yet there aren't many accidents. So everywhere we drove after that, I would wear Chloe in the Ergo to make me feel like I wasn't breaking any child safety laws.] We bought the expensive formula, made it to our guest house and started to slowly get to know our girl. I was taking photos to document this day that I had waited for for so long. We stayed in our room all day until we ventured out for a walk to eat dinner.
Of course Chloe at this time is going through one of the biggest transitions ever. She had been in an orphanage-transition home--back to orphanage---back to transition home in her 19 months of life, but each time that transition was made, it was with one of her nannies and/or CHI staff and by people who spoke like the people she heard speak every day and smell like the people she was around every day (Ethiopia has a very distinct smell)---now she is with these two people she knows nothing about. And she gets to leave the walls/gates of the only two places she's lived in. Her world just got big. Big chance of over-stimulation. You will notice on day 1 there is not a smile on Chloe's face in any picture on that day. I will never have any idea what went on in her little head that day. But I can tell you she and every orphan experience loss again on 'Gotcha Day'. They lose their "normal"--whether good or bad--that they have experienced up to this point. Although we had the "substitute" staff member, my guess is the day would have been much tougher to get through had we had to leave her favorite nanny or go through the entire CHI staff giving hugs or kisses. So in retrospect, the Saturday pick up was good.
After nap time, it seemed she warmed up to us. While in Ethiopia, Chris and I called her Dibora which was her given Ethiopian name. [Her name here when we finally get her US birth certificate finalized will be Chloe Dibora Hope]. She didn't seem scared of us, but she wasn't happy either. She seemed to attach to her toy baby doll very quickly. She did say her first word "caca" (apparently universal) and it was in the right context (i.e. she had a dirty diaper and she knew it) so we deemed her smart from day 1. I don't remember her crying the rest of the day, even when we bathed her in a shower stall. We lotion-ed her up and she quietly went to bed in her crib. It had been a long day.
 |
 |
| Digital collage personalized with Smilebox |
The next morning was a different story and we start to see the smiles and silliness that defines little Miss Chloe Dibora and we got to take her to church in Ethiopia. Even though I decided not to go with the "Life is Good" slideshow.....I want you to know life isn't good all the time, but God is good all the time and all the time God is good. He continued to show His faithfulness in bringing Chloe to us and us to her at just the right time. It isn't always easy, but it is good and right to follow the calling that God lays on your heart.
For me, that is what Gotcha Day was all about.
