#whatliftsyou

I could probably write a novel about this, yet it is only a blog, but where to start?

My freshman year of college---I transferred mid-semester to Ozark Christian College so that I could experience dorm life and belong to a group of fun-loving Jesus followers.  Even though I was a bit late to the party, my dorm friends welcomed me in quickly.  There were close to 30 some freshman in our dorm that year and if you know OCC that dwindles quickly due to people getting their MRS degree or transferring schools, etc.  By our junior year, there were 5 of us.  The fab 5 of Goodman 3rd.  I'm pretty sure the Fab 5 lasted a semester as well, because one (my college roommate) transferred to another college, one was the first to get engaged so she headed home to save money, and the other 3 (me included) moved into our first off-campus apartment and due to engagements/starting a family we only lived together for 7 months.  

Fab 5 posing at restaurant in Joplin, MO.

Fab 5 on Goodman 3rd.  

My college years are still considered some of the best times of my life.  And not just due to the Fab 5, but ALL my friends and the silly escapades we did---too many to list, but I LOVE you all! (Side note: One reason is Chris Strickland---but he really isn't in the picture till a bit later.)  Years later after some reflection, I am amazed at how God connected us and how we each, albeit somewhat different, had similar obstacles in life that we all encountered and we had each other to vent with and encourage us in our next steps.  We definitely were sisters in Christ that prayed with, laughed with, cried with, danced with, and just survived college life with each other.  

Three of us visited another in Knoxville, TN after she transferred colleges.  The three of us hiked Chimney Mountain.  Those same three visited each other in sunny Florida a few years later.  All five of us were teachers or in ministry or married into ministry and continued to have the same ups and downs of young adult ministry life.  Yet, minus some short visits here and there between 1 or 2 of us, the fab 5 hadn't been together since December 1996. 25 plus years.   

Our first Fab 5 Trip in Branson, MO, Dec. 1996.

We were finally making it happen.  We chose Nashville/Franklin, TN as a drivable destination spot for the majority of us.  And on day one, we picked up where we left off.  Of course we had to catch up a bit, but there was a lot of laughter and memories and absolutely no awkwardness, minus who was getting the king bed vs bunk beds. 

On Day 1, we met in Nashville and took pictures at this Nashville mural entitled #whatliftsyou (artist: kelseymontagueart.com/whatliftsyou/).   How appropriate.  

These college friends (and others) have been lifting me up since the moment I arrived on Goodman 3rd.  We've enjoyed sunset walks while living on campus, ice skating, hot chocolate parties, dancing, singing, attempting to be disciplined together in our studies, wishing and dreaming about our futures,  serving together on camp teams and mission trips, and so much more.  Friendship lifts me up, Proverbs 17:17 says a friend loves at all times and Proverbs 27:17 "as iron sharpens iron, so does one man (or woman) sharpen another".  God's desire for us in godly friendships is to build one another up and help us grow and be effective in our ministries.  Whether that is in bringing respite to tired minister wives, teachers, ministers themselves----through common threads, testimonies, and laughter or to genuinely praying with each other and hearing how God is working through each of them and their families and continuing His good work in them....It so lifted me up and I know it did to the rest of the Fab 5 as well.

Can't fully tell, but that is the
sunset at the end of Maverick.  :) 

So......besides lots of good eating, line dancing, shopping, watching Maverick, hiking, picture taking, and karaoking (pretty sure that is not a word) ....we got matching tattoos.  Obviously, we are all mamas teaching our adult kids that their tattoo must mean something and that it shouldn't be spur of the moment.  You need to sit with it a while and make sure this is something that you will resonate with for the rest of your life.  So ROAD TRIP '22 wasn't an option...but I would be one to argue that this tattoo, even though it wasn't specifically planned for our trip (to be fair, we had no specific plans except the vacation rental we had), I personally had been sitting with this for a long time.  Not so much the "what" of the tattoo, but the connection of the tattoo.   These sisters of mine that have lifted me up for the past 30 years mean a lot to me.  Of the 5 of us, 3 got real tattoos and it was the same 3 that have climbed the literal mountains and visited sunny Florida, and have enjoyed some of God's majestic creation together (including sunsets) and on our own. The other two joined in on the fun and got our tattoo stenciled on them.   

Melissa & I in the Great Smoky Mountains. 
This was M's 1st tattoo & my 3rd.  Shanna
might be behind the camera.  It was her 2nd. 

The meaning of the tattoo is four-fold.  1)  Psalm 113:3 says "From the rising of the sun, to the going down of the same the name of the Lord is to be praised" and Psalm 95:1-7 says we should sing for joy to the Lord; the mountain peaks belong to Him and that we should worship and kneel before the Lord, our maker.  So the tattoo speaks to God's almighty and majestic creation and how, we His people are to praise Him day and night.  2) 5 sun rays that represent the Fab 5.  3) 3 mountains represent Goodman 3rd-the dorm floor where we met and began our sweet friendships.  4)  The mountains are also a metaphor of the ups and downs; obstacles that we have faced.  Below I am sharing Steven Curtis Chapman's lyrics to "The Mountain" (I know it is a bit old-school, but coincidentally this song was released in 1995--the same year I transferred to OCC and began living on Goodman 3rd)  because I think it represents this so well.  We have these "mountain top" experiences (college life alone was one of those for me), CIY conferences, ministry highs, birth of our children, vacations enjoying God's creation, rest and sabbath moments, etc. and we know we will face another "valley".  Valleys in our family life, relationships, parenting our children, ministry, our health, and on and on.  So when I look at this tattoo it indeed "lifts me up" and I am strengthened in my faith by the conversation among my sisters that we have shared then and now.  

Shanna made these shirts and we got a whole lot of questions/
comments while wearing them shopping in Downtown Franklin.

It is only by the grace of God that these friendships began, endured, and continue to sharpen each other and lift each other up.  From a season of life that can typically be hard and confusing, God gave me something oh so very good.  And 25+ years later, I am so grateful He (and our 5 husbands) gave us the opportunity to have another "mountain top" moment that was good for my thirsty soul.  

Portions of  "The Mountain" by Steven Curtis Chapman

I want to build a house up on this mountain
Way up high where the peaceful waters flow                                                                                          To quench my thirsty soul up on the mountain

I can see for miles up on this mountain                                                                                            Troubles seem so small they almost disappear                                                                                   Lord I love it here up on the mountain

My faith is strengthened by all that I see
You make it easy for me to believe up on the mountain
Oh, up on the mountain

Yea..

You bring me up here on the mountain
For me to rest and learn and grow
I see the truth up on the mountain
And I carry it to the world far below
So as I go down to the valley
Knowing that you will go with me
This is my prayer Lord help me to remember what you showed me
Up on the mountain
Up on the mountain

I cherish these times up on the mountain....

If you are still with me, thank you for listening to my sentiments and please post something that lifts you.  #whatliftsyou?

A Marriage Anchored

 Chris and I got the opportunity to get away for a week (March 2022).  It was such a fantastic time of rest and refreshment that the two of us have not experienced in a long time.....it also happened to be during our 23rd wedding anniversary. [Obviously, the 23rd anniversary usually isn't a "big" anniversary---but on our 20th we were just returning to FCC and had no means and time to go on such a trip.]

We took a road trip along the Pacific Northwest coast and enjoyed God's creation from the mighty redwoods to the rocky shoreline to  the serene ocean waters and all of it was just awesomely beautiful.  We both were awestruck. 

However, in some remote parts we were unable to get any radio stations and we weren't prepared with a whole lot of downloads.  So as soon as we got to a place where we could, we decided to download a few marriage podcasts to listen to.  We didn't take too much time finding the perfect one, so as we started listening we both were encouraged that our marriage had never been to the point of the couples in the podcast (and these were Christian leaders/ministers).  I don't say that to brag, nor do I say it to claim we have a perfect marriage.  (Believe me, we don't!). But I do say it out loud here, so that I don't take it for granted.  I am grateful for how Chris loves me far better than I often deserve.  

So I bought this little souvenir on the trip to remind me of our marriage, our 23 years so far, and to reflect on the fact that because we both have Christ as our anchor of hope that it makes our marriage work better. Again, I know even Christian marriages are not void of rocky waters and storms, but am so grateful I can be so secure in our relationship because of who Chris is in Christ.  Because of that our marriage is anchored and strong and because of that, I am grateful. 

                                  

A few scriptures my bracelet brings to mind: 

Mark 10:8-9 "and the two are united into one. Since they are no longer two but one, let no one split apart what God has joined together. "

Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 "Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed. If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But someone who falls alone is in real trouble. Likewise two people lying close together can keep each other warm. But how can one be warm alone? A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back to back and conquer. Three are even better for a triple braided cord is not easily broken." 

Hebrews 6:16-19 "Now when people take an oath, they call on someone greater than themselves to hold them to it. And without any question that oath is binding. God also bound himself with an oath, so that those who received the promise could be perfectly sure that he would never change his mind. So God has given both his promise and his oath. These two things are unchangeable because it is impossible for God to lie. Therefore, we who have fled to him for refuge can have great confidence as we hold to the hope that lies before us. This hope is a strong and trustworthy anchor for our souls..."

Chris and I took an oath 23 years ago and Christ, our Anchor, is holding us to it.  He is strong and trustworthy, both for our two individual souls and for our one marriage.  

Happy New Year!

Welcome 2020!  I have been married for 20 years (21 in March). But as it stands today on New Year's, 20 years to the most amazing, selfless, funny, talented, humble man, who also happens to be a wonderful father to our 4 blessings. As you can see, we like traveling, baseball, hikes, and our 4 kids are represented in these pics....but I wanted to share just "us".......(I couldn't find a 2003 without Eden), but someday these 4 blessings will be out of our home (most in this next decade 😭)....and it will be just "us" again. So we make it a priority to make our marriage important.  We've been to Santa Barbara/Santa Clarita/LA, Russia, San Diego, Grand Canyon while we lived in Arizona.  Beautiful Branson, North Carolina, Colorado, Tennessee, West Carribean, Los Cabos, and certainly not least 2 amazing trips to Ethiopia while we lived in Missouri.  Since 2000, we have had 3 churches we've been a part of: 4.5 years in AZ, 4 years in Branson, and 11.5 years in Washington, MO.   So enjoy my journey down memory lane ---I've posted one picture for each year, plus New Year's Eve 1999 and New Year's Day 2020.  I can't wait to see what the next 20 years will entail....but I know it will be fantastic as long as Chris is by my side.  

New Year's Eve. December 1999.  Phoenix, AZ. 

2000

2001

2002

2003

2004

2005

2006

2007

2008

2009

2010

2011

2012

2013

2014

2015

2016

2017

2018

2019

January 1, 2020

Awakening

"Seek first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness, 

and all these things will be added to you."  Matt. 6:33

In my study, there are three parts.  Awakening. Honesty.  Action.  (Hence the acronym AHA).  I am a bit more than half way done and am diving into the Honesty portion of the study.  I'll be honest, the honesty portion is not an easy task. (see the irony?) So for now, I will refect on the first section---Awakening.

Awakening can be defined as "an opportunity to wake up and encounter God in a deeper way than ever before."  It is an opportunity to see God work.  An opportunity to experience His healing and redeeming love in a whole new way.  I want that.  I seek that.  But then I don't.  Why?  I am not sure.  But I know I want the end of my story to change.  I want to draw nearer to God and and be transformed.  The text mentions that we are living in a "country of the blind".  We are blind to the world's subtle trappings.  We are supposedly meaningfully transformed, or changed on a Sunday and then the rest of the week---we are caught up in our routine.  I know this is true of me.  Not that I am necessarily a "Sunday Christian", but more so that I let the world talk me off my proverbial ledge the very next day.  I walk immediately back into THE world.  One of the practical ways, the author says to open our eyes and refocus, (rather than remain blind) is to go on a retreat, change your routine. I was able to do just that this past weekend and the retreat was good.  I was able to be still and listen, to seek God's truth and come to some realizations about my spiritual growth (or lack there of).  I realized I walk into THE world of laziness and convenience.  I walk into my own comfortable world.    I walk back into the world of selfishness and pride.  Different distractions and idols come at me and I let them sweep over me.  Other realizations I had is that I truly was trying to live by my own power, rather than the Holy Spirit living in me.  And that I continue to put my trust in other things rather than God alone.  I don't mean to....but being blind I just subconciously go there.  I don't have any "magic" resolution as of yet.  But I believe if I am more honest with myself in the days to come and truly take action after my honesty is revealed, that there is hope for lasting change.  I feel like I have been a prisoner of sorts for a while now, definitely not free.  I believe God is asking me to surrender my role of prisoner and instead accept my role of citizen in His Kingdom------not the Kingdom of this world. 

It is time to wake up---for good!

Where are you?

"Open my eyes that I may see wonderful things in your law."  Psalm 119:18

I currently have a six year old, but in family age she is just four (since she was almost two when we brought her home). She is in the "I can do it myself" stage, as each of my three other kids have gone through the same stage.  As a parent, you've been there, haven't you?  

Or your hubby doesn't want to resort to stopping and asking for directions because he thinks he can get back on track on his own.  He doesn't need help from the GPS or anyone else for that matter.  Have you experienced this?

Or you, yourself think you can take control of several areas of your life that you've neglected and let "go downhill"--without help because you are so capable of doing it on your own, or so you think.  

Or on the other hand, you've stopped praying or believing or doing any action because you don't believe you can change.  Or you don't believe the person you've been praying for can change.  You don't admit it outloud, but you don't have that kind of faith.  Have you been there?  

I have.  I am still there.  

Day 1: I read that AHA is not a self-help process.  I can't help myself.  This study is the opposite of a self-help book.  "This journey begins with a rejection of your self's offer to help."  So instead, I am asking God for help.   I am helpless and I obviously cannot do this on my own.  The goal of the challenge is not to find ways to change ourselves, but rather to seek and relate to God in ways that allow Him to change us.  So I am waiting on that breakthrough.  Living in expectation that God will open my eyes and that I will humbly see a breakthrough---not because of anything I've done or any self-determination on my part,  but because I'm relying on God's help alone.  

Day 2:  "AHA begins with recognizing my current location."  In other words, what is my spiritiual condition and what are the areas in my life that I've not welcomed God?  I felt like "not welcoming God" was harsh....maybe I need to sit and dwell on whether or not that is true.  I did think that there are areas where God is definitely not as evident.  God isn't daily living with me there (in my curent location).  These are the areas I mentioned yesterday....finances, health/weight managment, and prayer life.  Again, I feel like I haven't completely left God out of these areas...but I haven't let Him be in complete control either.  Or I've stopped believing that change is possible.  A couple of people I've stopped praying daily for, because I've actually thought, "What's the point? They will never change or follow God."  Like the Prodigal Son in Luke 15, I hope that I have finally "come to my senses".  Some "alarms" have been going off and I have been hitting the snooze button for a while now.  Not sure exactly how I got here....but hitting snooze and ignoring some of the alarms did not help me.  And the main reason I arrived at my current location is sin.  "Sin is the vehicle" which has caused me to leave out God, run from God, attempt to hide from God, or just try to avoid God in particular areas of my life.  I predict that I am going to have to come face to face with some specific sins within this AHA journey.  I have to wake up and heed the warnings so that I am not decieved about what this sin can do to me and my relationship with God.  Still chewing on this line, "The effectiveness of the alarm is in direct correlation to how much you don't want to hear it.  In other words, until your desire not to hear the alarm outweighs your desire to keep sleeping---you're not going to wake up."  Ouch!  I kind of understand that though.  I've said, " I want to lose weight".  I've said it repeatedly. But at the same time, I don't want to stop drinking soda.  Or I don't want to wake up early and exercise.  My desire to lose weight has not outweighed my desire to drink soda or my desire to sleep in.  I hope through this study God finally gets my attention and I have an awakening.  I know things must change and instead of sin crouching at my door hoping to rule me, I must, with God's help, rule over it.  (Gen 4:7).  The good news is (and we get this from the example of Adam and Eve)---even though we try to avoid God or leave him out---He is constantly seeking us out so we can be with Him.  He comes after us to redeem us and repair our brokenness.  

Prayer:  Open my eyes and awaken me Lord.  May I be transformed from the inside out.  I am expecting changes in my life, my marriage, and my family.  I can't do it on my own.  I need you Lord.  Amen.

The song below is really my prayer.  And I've sung this song many, many times.  And I believe it.  I just need to live like I believe it.  

"Aha!"

Do you remember the movie "Coming to America"?  I'm not endorsing the movie....but I will admit it is an old movie that we've enjoyed and there are several funny parts played by Eddie Murphy.  One of the jokes at the end during the credits goes like this:

"A man goes into a restaurant. You listenin'? A man goes into a restaurant, and he sits down, he's having a bowl of soup and he says to the waiter, waiter come taste the soup. Waiter says: Is something wrong with the soup? He says: Taste the soup. He says: Is there something wrong with the soup? Is the soup too hot? He says: Will you taste the soup? What's wrong, is the soup too cold? Will you just taste the soup?! Allright, I'll taste the soup - where's the spoon?? Aha. Aha! "

The moment the "Aha" comes is like a lightbulb moment, where you figure out he can't taste his soup because he was never given a spoon.  

Well I feel like I've been waiting for an "Aha", lightbulb moment, for a long time now.  It seems like I've done this or that, and many of them good things, but nothing fully "clicks" if you know what I mean.  There is no lasting change.  No lasting change in several areas of my life.  Finances.  Health/Weight Management.  Prayer/Devotional Life.  

So.....enter a challenge that is more about "inner transormation" that hopefully (but may not) bring outward change.  I am doing this challenge, knowing the process is more important than the product.  I am hopefully going to recognize what behaviors or attitudes that I have that contribute to me not  seeing the change I desire. 

If I am going to be real honest, I have found myself in a "drought" spiritually.  I am not worried about my faith, but I feel like for such a long time my cup was being filled regularly and I have slowly let it empty without "topping it off".    I am now running on fumes and need to be reawakened.  

I am a bit nervous that it still won't "click".  That the "Aha"s won't bring lasting change.  That I will sound like a broken record.  I'll let myself down again.  But that's just it.  It isn't about me.  It is about dependence on Him.  

Besides scripture, I am reading Kyle Idleman's book 40 Days to Lasting Change:  An AHA Challenge.  We've owned the book and this accompanying challenge for probably 3 years (since it came out) and yet haven't read it or fully accepted the challenge.  So I started today.  I have exactly 40 days till I go back to school officially and I pray these 40 days will bring the AHA moments that I need to transform these areas of my life (or at least change the trajectory of where these areas are headed currently).  I will journal my thoughts, struggles, and light bulb  moments on my blog from my readings.   AHA ia an acronym that through the study of Scripture and testimonies within the book will draw me closer to God by "Awakening to the reality of my spiritual condition; seeing with brutal Honesty, my need for a Savior; which then leads to my need to take Action to follow Christ's example."  Awakening.  Honesty. Action.  AHA!

Friends, if you read all of this....first off, thank you for reading and thank you for (hopefully) not judging me and my "drought".   Second, would you hold me accountable?  If you haven't seen a post in a few days would you privately message me and question me on it?  I would appreciate my sisters in Christ speaking truth into my life.  In the book, it quotes Proverbs 27:6, "Wounds from a friend can be trusted."  Kyle goes on to say, " a familiar voice speaking truth into your life is exactly what you need, but it's rarely what you want."  (So if we aren't real good friends, then no need to give advice---lol).  But if you are someone I have shared life with via a meal, a cup of coffee, prayer times, a bible study, etc.  then I welcome (I think) truth and/or simply encouragement.

I know I haven't hit rock bottom, but I also know...even if I can't currently pinpoint why....that I haven't always been honest with myself or with God about my struggles.  I also know if no one else knows I am struggling, then I can just go on with life and pretend like I didn't make this commitment or take this challenge.  I am really good at taking on a challenge and ending it a week later and no one was the wiser.  I am hoping this is my wake up call so that I never have to hit rock bottom or that I can at least head in the right direction, moving forward and 'growing in grace and knowledge of my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. To Him be the glory!' (2 Peter 3:18)

Thanks for listening to my sentiments.  

Snoozing Jesus?

      I'm a work in progress.  I have been for a long time.  You'd figure after almost 20 years of ministry that I would have the best devotional life, right?  Wrong.  Don't get me wrong.  I love God's scriptures.  I'm a Bible journaler, worship singer (loudly in the car to many songs based on Scripture), and a Sunday morning note taking fool.  We pray often in our family, enjoy spiritual conversations, etc.  But as far as a consistent, "daily" time with the Lord---for me that has been MIA.  I've struggled.  I've wanted to have this time. However, the exhaustedness (is that a word?) of the day prevents me from staying up to complete it in the evening.  While I was a stay at home mom, mid-day nap time was suppose to be pivotal for me getting my quiet time in, and sometimes I did--but a lot of the time I filled the time with phone calls, checking my emails/facebook account, chores, and let's be honest---I napped myself.  I do enjoy sleep.  Which brings me to the morning, I will choose sleep over all.  Honestly, I rarely wear make-up.  I sleep a little longer.  I don't make breakfast or drink coffee.  I sleep a little longer.  I don't read the newspaper. I sleep a little longer.  So I sleep till the last minute I possibly can in order to get dressed, look somewhat presentable, and head out the door.  Until recently.

       In a challenge group of mine we were listing some goals for the month and I had heard of the First 5 app from a friend who was loving it.  I also have loved She Reads Truth, an app that has great devotions as well.  But what is different about First 5 is that it literally is my alarm clock.  It wakes me up to to some fun music and blinds me with it's bright white screen. ( I mean "hurt your eyes, blinding light at 6: something in the morning").   And straight from the app:  "The vision of First 5 was developed by Proverbs 31 Ministries in order to connect your heart to God's Word the First 5 minutes of your day.  First 5 will wake you up with a short teaching first thing in the morning, so you can exchange whispers with God before shouts with the world."  Let's face it, there are lots of "shouts" from the world.  And for almost 2 months I've been doing it, daily during the work week.  Already getting up earlier on a daily basis for my teaching job (adulting is hard work, right?) than I have been in 10+ years, I added this to my first moments of the day.

     Now, granted it is only 5 minutes or so.  It can be more.  You can go even deeper.  But I am here to argue that conistent for the first time in a long time can be equally as deep.  A deep understanding that I truly do need these first moments of my day to be Christ-seeking.  A deeper understanding that when I do this small act, I've invited the Holy Spirit to be a part of my life and thought processes for the day.  And perhaps the deepest understanding, that my Father in heaven deserves no less from me.

Now the weird thing is that since it is literally an alarm clock, you can still hit the snooze button.Your choices are to snooze or read. So I didn't think anything of it at first, but then when telling friends about the app, I made a startling realization that I was SNOOZING JESUS! I'm happy to report that before my feet hit the floor I am having a moment with the Lord. However, I cannot tell a lie, I still do hit the snooze button every now and then.  I'm a work in progress.

***Today's devo confirmed this need for my first moments of the day to be with the Lord.  I heard a quote recently that can be applied to many areas of my life--"Breakthrough begins when excuses ends."  I hope that you never hear me say, "I'm not a morning person" in relation to why I can't start my day off with Jesus.  I have used that excuse for quite awhile and I'm ready for my breakthrough!  How about you?  I know many of my friends have wonderful quiet times.  I hope to encourage those that have struggled, maybe as long as I have.  Here's "A Date at Daybreak" from First5.

If Christ did nothing else.....

{Nothing like a 2 year sabbatical on the blog front.

Let's ignore that fact and just jump right into what I'm reflecting on today.}

My pastor said a lot of good stuff in his sermon today that I may write about later. However, he was just talking about our Thanksgiving feasts and how they do not begin to compare to the Table (Lord's Supper) we share in every Sunday. This made me think if I had no feast, no house, no job, no other blessing given to me here on Earth that I still have everything to be thankful for....That being my Savior. I have heard Chris say this sentiment many times before (that If Christ did nothing else for us, we still owe him everything).

So I wrote this poem this afternoon after continuing to reflect on that truth.

      

Christ: Heart & Soul

Immanuel, Thank you for your body.

That left perfect for the imperfect.

That left all that is good for what is often evil.  

That left your position of King to come down to be servant.

That left exaltation to become humbled.

That said “Thy will be done.”

That willingly died to give me life.

Thank you for your heart that died for me.

Messiah, Thank you for your blood.

That is pure and good.

That provides mercy and forgiveness.

That gives peace and righteousness.

That shares love and grace.

That seeks those who are lost.

That redeems and offers a rich inheritance.

Thank you for your soul that bled for me.

Amber Strickland

11-20-2016

Gotcha Day

A few things I noticed while trying to honor the day that Chloe was forever in our arms.  I searched on my blog for last year's post where I shared Gotcha day pics and realized I never blogged about it. I knew I had posted pics on facebook, but never found them while searching my timeline.  So here I am a year later and going to highlight a few things  about Gotcha Day 2013.  Also while I was trying to create my slideshow/collage/whatever it was I was going to post....it was difficult.  Because the first one, which was adorable chalk art slideshow titled "Life is Good" just didn't seem to work for a day that wasn't the greatest day in the history book of the Strickland family and yet was one of the greatest all at the same time.  All the free music choices were "upbeat", "happy", and "cheerful"----when you see the pics in the collage, you will notice Chloe is anything but those three words.

1.  Some people don't even like the term "Gotcha Day"---I'm not one of them.  It seems like a shorthand way of saying, "the day you forever were received into our arms" or "the day we picked you up for forever from the orphanage/transition home/foster home that you had been living at up to this point".  Just simpler to say "the day we got you".  And in no way are we minimizing the day.  We didn't get to go to a store and pick you out and you weren't a prize to be had.  We waited a LONG time for this day.  We prayed a LONG time for this day.  Every adoptive family knows what this day means in their hearts and in the life of their family.  The day you changed our lives forever because we got to be your parents full time. The day that God gave you to us to hold forever---finally.

2.  Gotcha Day, 99% of the time is not necessarily fun.  I made this statistic up, but many that I've talked to describe this day as terribly hard for the newly adoptive parents, for the nannies or foster parents that have been caring for your child for a long time, and especially for the child.  Ours wasn't the worst day ever, but it wasn't the easiest either.  It was Saturday, so the majority of the House of Hope staff was off work that day.  There was a nanny and 2 cooks present when we picked Chloe up.  It had been 10 weeks since we had seen her last and we had a "substitute" staff liaison/translator that took us to the home.  She brought Chloe in and she immediately started screaming/crying to the point of throwing up.  We had to get some information like her eating and sleeping schedule and quickly she fell asleep in Chris' arms---which we believe to be her stress coping mechanism at the time.  I stepped down to the lobby to take photos and videos of newly referred kids whose parents were excited to get real pic of video footage of their children.....but even then we wanted to get to our guest house (hotel) and I didn't get to spend a good amount of time with these kids like I would have liked. I maybe spent 10 minutes with them.  The substitute was ready to take us to buy formula, Chloe woke up as we changed her into clothes we brought, said bye to the big kids I just photographed, the cooks kissed her and we were on our way.  She was crying again and again fell asleep in the back of the car in Chris' arms.  [Side note: there are no car seats in Ethiopia and driving is a bit crazy, yet there aren't many accidents.  So everywhere we drove after that, I would wear Chloe in the Ergo to make me feel like I wasn't breaking any child safety laws.]  We bought the expensive formula, made it to our guest house and started to slowly get to know our girl.  I was taking photos to document this day that I had waited for for so long.  We stayed in our room all day until we ventured out for a walk to eat dinner.

Of course Chloe at this time is going through one of the biggest transitions ever.  She had been in an orphanage-transition home--back to orphanage---back to transition home in her 19 months of life, but each time that transition was made, it was with one of her nannies and/or CHI staff and by people who spoke like the people she heard speak every day and smell like the people she was around every day (Ethiopia has a very distinct smell)---now she is with these two people she knows nothing about.  And she gets to leave the walls/gates of the only two places she's lived in.  Her world just got big. Big chance of over-stimulation.  You will notice on day 1 there is not a smile on Chloe's face in any picture on that day.  I will never have any idea what went on in her little head that day.  But I can tell you she and every orphan experience loss again on 'Gotcha Day'.  They lose their "normal"--whether good or bad--that they have experienced up to this point.  Although we had the "substitute" staff member, my guess is the day would have been much tougher to get through had we had to leave her favorite nanny or go through the entire CHI staff giving hugs or kisses.  So in retrospect, the Saturday pick up was good.

After nap time, it seemed she warmed up to us.  While in Ethiopia, Chris and I called her Dibora which was her given Ethiopian name.  [Her name here when we finally get her US birth certificate finalized will be Chloe Dibora Hope].  She didn't seem scared of us, but she wasn't happy either. She seemed to attach to her toy baby doll very quickly. She did say her first word "caca" (apparently universal) and it was in the right context (i.e.  she had a dirty diaper and she knew it) so we deemed her smart from day 1.  I don't remember her crying the rest of the day, even when we bathed her in a shower stall. We lotion-ed her up and she quietly went to bed in her crib.  It had been a long day.

Digital collage personalized with Smilebox

The next morning was a different story and we start to see the smiles and silliness that defines little Miss Chloe Dibora and we got to take her to church in Ethiopia.  Even though I decided not to go with the "Life is Good" slideshow.....I want you to know life isn't good all the time, but God is good all the time and all the time God is good.  He continued to show His faithfulness in bringing Chloe to us and us to her at just the right time.  It isn't always easy, but it is good and right to follow the calling that God lays on your heart.

For me, that is what Gotcha Day was all about.