A letter to our friends & family---

Dear friends & family,

This is sort of tough to write, but it is very much needed....especially because of the outpouring of love that has been shown our Chloe from family members, friends across the country, but especially our local friends and church family.  You are the ones that have in essence brought Chloe home....and now we have to share what may seem like initially "bad"news.  But in the end this is the best for Chloe and I know in my heart of hearts that is what you want too.

So.....after three years of waiting and pursuing and longing and praying for Chloe, it is time to bring her home.  (Can I get a Hallelujah?!)  I know we can never thank you enough for the love, support, encouragement, financial assistance, friendship and prayers over the past 3 years.  It has been a long, hard journey however, we would be naive to think the "hard" is over.  The real challenge is still ahead of us (transitioning her into our family and raising her)!

So the hard part is telling you how our family is going to work for the next few weeks or even months. And it is not meant to be offensive, but rather to give you all a heads up and hopefully a few answers to the "why"s of our next phase if you will.  Please read these not as suggestions but rather heartfelt requests from us as we transition (and feel free to share what you know to non-blog readers who may think we've disappeared from the planet or have become non-people people).  Also other adoptive friends may or may not have done something similar, every adoption is so different in circumstances, that what one family may feel the need to do another will not.....This is what we are choosing for our family.

1.  We will practice a common process in the adoption world called "cocooning".  It has been shown to provide lifelong benefits to the child, specifically in the areas of relationships, identity, and development. So you may not see us much at first. We are going to hunker down in our home.  Our number one priority is to our daughter and building a strong bond with her. It's so important to teach her that we are her parents and that Eden, Eli, and Tobe are her siblings. It is criticial that this bond happens before she bonds with any other family or friends. The way we will do this is by staying home for a couple of weeks {or longer} until we feel that Chloe is ready to be introduced to other places. Why?

Chloe has been a blessed little girl. So far, she has been given very good care by every adult in her life both at the orphanage and the transition home. However, her little brain is learning that EVERY adult person in her life will take care of her. For her safety and also her ability to form good relationships later in life, we need to teach her to trust a few people, and then slowly let others into her life. We want her to know that we are "It" for her. She is not going to be passed off to any other care givers.  So that even means the church nursery, MOPS, no date nights for a while with our wonderful teens, until we know that there has been a good attachment to us as her parents.

2. Please be patient with us.  When we finally do leave the house, we still may stay "where ever" for shorter periods of time, arrive late and leave early.  As one friend put it "good-bye may need to be implied".  And when we make it to church or to Target or the grocery store where there are SO many of you lovely people, I will be wearing Chloe in a carrier.  This promotes additional bonding b/w her & I.  Plus it will help her from getting over-whelmed with new environments that could be over-stimulating. This also keeps others from holding her or touching her a lot. This may seem harsh and I know this will be tough at first, but we promise you, it will only last for a season and it’s the best for Chloe.  Why?

Please keep in mind that Chloe's view of the world is currently limited to one room (besides the couch room where we were able to snuggle with her).......but normally she is confined to her crib room (with bare walls) and 10 other toddlers and a couple of toys that are shared between them. Places and people will be all new to our girl.  It is not going to be hard for her to be over-stimulated.

3.  We will do some things with Chloe that will look more like what we would do with a baby than what we should do with a toddler. Although Chloe is 18 months, her "family age" will begin when we pick her up from the orphanage. By the very nature of being in an orphanage, there are things done that are very "babyish" with her. We will not potty train as early as we did with our other kids. And even though we thought she was potty trained, it will actually be good to change diapers, play baby games, and give lots of eye contact. We will continue to feed her very much like a baby {she still takes bottles and eats cereal}, introducing new foods through baby food and working up to solid food. We will also hold her and carry her and rock her as much as she will tolerate.  Why?  There are two ways to look at child's age: Chronological Age and Family Age. Her chronological age is 18 months but her family age is just beginning.  These things are essential to the bonding process and partly because she has not had that kind of care that all babies deserve in order to form and understand long-lasting, unconditional relationships.

4. Chris and I will need to meet all of Chloe's needs. If she needs fed, changed, held, rocked, disciplined, or helped, we will need to do all of that for quite a while. For those of you who will come to visit, please do not try to meet any of her needs as this is, again, essential to her bonding with us.
 This may be exhausting and so different from how we handled our biological kids. For example, if she trips and falls at the park, it is crucial that you send her to us to comfort her or give her the bandaid . She will try to get her needs met by anyone who is willing, so until she realizes Chris and I are different from everyone else we need to meet those needs exclusively. We have to set up these safe boundaries until she can figure out how to make them for herself. We know this is against your normal instincts and even mine, that is why we are sending this out in advance so you know our expectations and know how you can help us when we’re together. Why?

It's easy to think that she is adapting so well when you see adopted children happy with strangers, smiling and getting other's attention. But at this point, those things would actually still be signs they have not figured out who we are, as their mom and dad. In their short lives, they've had many care givers. They will likely see us as simply another set of care givers for quite awhile. But we're trusting over time, they'll come to understand what it means that we are Mommy and Daddy to them and Eden, Eli, & Tobe are siblings.

5. When we discipline Chloe, it will look different than how we discipline our other children. We must do everything we can to build our bonds with our little girl, which includes how we discipline her. We will be employing a method called "time in," which basically means that we will hold her and calm her while we correct the misbehavior. This may look exhausting (and it probably is)  or like it is not the most straight-forward method of discipline, but this has been a proven method of effective discipline for adopted children. Why? Well there are lots of pyschological reasons for this, but one of the ones off the top of my head is that any orphan has a lot of loss and subsequently grief that they deal with.  Sending them away from us for a time out or taking away a lot of things may not be beneficial for a while and actually backwards from our ultimate goal of them feeling like they belong.

6. Chloe is not a celebrity.  That sounds kind of harsh too.  I want to show her off, I want to share in the testimony of how faithful God has been to us. But at the same time, taking photos of just our adopted child or pouring attention on her while ignoring our other children is not healthy for anyone. The child who is receiving all of the attention often feels singled out and siblings quickly become resentful. We appreciate all of the love and support that we were shown during our adoption process and we know that everyone is excited to meet her.  Especially since most people know Chris and I due to ministry, please take cues and be very sensitive to this (like in the church hallway).

WHAT CAN YOU DO?

There are specific ways we could use your support:

1. Meals - if you would like to cook a meal for our family, we welcome it. We're going to have a grueling journey back home with an infant who is taking her first plane ride with (virtually) complete strangers who don't speak her language. God help us and all the passengers on those flights home! We will come back exhausted and jet-lagged (hopefully with no ankle or feet issues) and our little blossom will be on a timezone 8 hours ahead of us. I imagine the first week that we'll all pretty much be in a fog.  My wonderful MOPS group and a church friend will be coordinating meals so if you wish, message me and I will get you in contact with them. And if you are literally one of the first, please don't be offended when we may ask to "drop and run". I have no idea what the first week will be like.  

2.  If you do bring a meal or just come to visit please be aware of the previously mentioned things. For the first few weeks, if you come to our house, we ask that you please call first. We do not want more than one family here at a time so as not to overwhelm anyone. We also ask that you plan for the visit to be quick. We will not feel comfortable asking you to leave, so please just do that on your own. If you come, feel free to bring your kids with you as the big 3 would love to see their friends :)

3. Companionship -  I might go crazy trying to lay low and stay near home so much. (Seriously--HUGE prayer need--pretty sure I've never stayed home).  We might feel isolated and out of the loop with our friends. We might feel tired and overwhelmed and in need of distraction.  Chris and I can possibly tag team and sneak away at times for a treat and breath of fresh air. Or if you are a parent to  one of Eden, Eli, or Tobe's friends please feel free to sneak them away too.  They too will be going through some adjustment.

4. Prayer - We need you to be praying for us and Chloe in this time. This transition is critical in her development as a person, and the things we do with her as she enters our family will lay the groundwork for relationships for her for the rest of her life. No pressure there! We need prayers for wisdom, patience, and selflessness. Also prayers for all the siblings as they transition and patience as they witness the "hard".  Pray they won't feel neglected and especially Tobe who for 5.5 years has been my "baby". (sniff, sniff)

5. Check-ins - Please leave us voicemails, emails, texts, fb messages, or good óle snail mail  just to let us know you're thinking of us, praying for us, or available to help. Even if we don't respond to your messages, we will receive them and they will be a comfort to us. 

6. We are weak and need your help to stay strong. Both Chris and I are people pleasers to some extent. Now that you know our plan, please don't ask us to break this plan.  Stay strong and hold us accountable too. Ask us if that's what we really want, and remind us of why we're doing what we're doing. We need your help to stick to the plan!

If you have any questions feel free to ask and we will do our best to answer. Remember all of this is super new to us too and we'll probably make a lot of mistakes. But we thank you so much for praying with us through it and for the grace you'll extend to us along the way! We love you all and can't wait for you to meet our newest addition to the Strickland Family!

BTW, Chloe has already been adopted, once she is home....she does not get adopted over and over again, she will be part of our forever family and one of the four greatest blessings God has granted us.  Thanks for listening to my sentiments and may God be glorified!

For further reading, check out these links:

 *****JEN HATMAKER'S  "How to be the Village" (skip to the After the Airport part)

 

Bringing Home a New Child - Cocoon

31 Days: Day 30/31

S0...I will be hanging out with my family tomorrow evening for Harvest Night, thus bringing me to my last post of the month.  Obviously, I didn't have 31 posts....I did post 58% of the days (academically that is still an F---but mathematically it is at least the majority of the month).  So for now, I will lay down the "discipline" posts for a bit and either practice what I preach or stop being so hard on myself and my lack of discipline.  But speaking of Harvest Night---I came across this verse tonight:  No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.   Hebrews 12:11


I also came across this definition of discipline that I hadn't necessarily thought of from American Heritage Dictionary:  A state of order based on submission to rules and authority.  So I am most excited to share how I am disciplined or where I see discipline in my life: I have submitted to my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ and have a persevering obedience of faith in Him since age 11 and due to this disciplined lifestyle of faith I will win a crown of glory and live eternally!  I am running the race! And will await the best possible result/reward from any type of discipline.

Excerpt from Matthew Henry's Commentary on Hebrews 12: The persevering obedience of faith in Christ, was the race set before the Hebrews, wherein they must either win the crown of glory, or have everlasting misery for their portion; and it is set before us. By the sin that does so easily beset us, understand that sin to which we are most prone, or to which we are most exposed, from habit, age, or circumstances. This is a most important exhortation; for while a man's darling sin, be it what it will, remains unsubdued, it will hinder him from running the Christian race, as it takes from him every motive for running, and gives power to every discouragement. When weary and faint in their minds, let them recollect that the holy Jesus suffered, to save them from eternal misery. By stedfastly looking to Jesus, their thoughts would strengthen holy affections, and keep under their carnal desires. Let us then frequently consider him. What are our little trials to his agonies, or even to our deserts? What are they to the sufferings of many others? There is a proneness in believers to grow weary, and to faint under trials and afflictions; this is from the imperfection of grace and the remains of corruption. Christians should not faint under their trials..............But the Father of our souls never willingly grieves nor afflicts his children. It is always for our profit. Our whole life here is a state of childhood, and imperfect as to spiritual things; therefore we must submit to the discipline of such a state. When we come to a perfect state, we shall be fully reconciled to all God's chastisement of us now. God's correction is not condemnation; the chastening may be borne with patience, and greatly promote holiness.

Hebrews 12:7-9 (NLT)

⁷ As you endure this divine discipline, remember that God is treating you as his own children. Who ever heard of a child who is never disciplined by its father? ⁸ If God doesn’t discipline you as he does all of his children, it means that you are illegitimate and are not really his children at all. ⁹ Since we respected our earthly fathers who disciplined us, shouldn’t we submit even more to the discipline of the Father of our spirits, and live forever?

SO......I finish this series with these questions:  Have you submitted to Jesus Christ's authority in your life?  Are you in fact disciplined, orderly, and obedient in your faith and striving to share in His holiness?  Do you consider yourself His child and planning on living forever?  If not, I pray you will evaluate and become disciplined-----like me!  :)  And if you want/need to talk to someone call me---I would love to share with you my testimony of discipline.

Proverbs 1:7 

The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and discipline.

Job 5:17 

"Blessed is the man whom God corrects; so do not despise the discipline of the Almighty.

Proverbs 10:17 

He who heeds discipline shows the way to life, but whoever ignores correction leads others astray.

Proverbs 12:1 

Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge, but he who hates correction is stupid

2 Timothy 1:7 

For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline.

Hebrews 12:10

Our fathers disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, that we may share in his holiness.

Thanks for listening.  

Love, 

Disciplined Daughter of God

31 Days: Day 28.

So honestly I haven't been disciplined in anything EXCEPT watching my beloved Cardinals WIN the World Series! Without doubt, one of the best series in recent history. (I think the D-Backs/Yankees in 2001 was also a nail biting series). So congrats Cardinals and I blame you for the lack of posts this final week of my 31 Days (lol---love blaming others when I know I probably wouldn't have done it anyways). Obviously, the players/coaches/managers/and I am sure tons more are very disciplined individuals and some of them met their ultimate career goal tonight. Most athletes are very disciplined people and one reason we should encourage our children to participate in sports, whether they are team or not. I enjoyed watching the games and I saw them till completion (a true sign of discipline).

***Note: Posting this picture so we call all remember "Buschie" the Rally Squirrel and how perhaps he should have been the MVP of the series.***

31 Days......More or Less (Day 25)

So.....obviously not so disciplined in the blog arena as well. Blogging 31 days in a row seemed a bit unrealistic at first, and now I know it was. :) Anyways, besides having Bronchitis and being so exhausted lately....I also did have a fun getaway weekend with some besties to scrapbook. I am not totally caught up---but not too far behind. It was a good weekend to finally get away. But back to the topic at hand: discipline.

Today I want to share about one of the most disciplined people I know. This weekend my friend Cass & I really razzed our best friend Missy for many reasons. Basically the reason is because we are jealous of her disciplined lifestyle. She has disciplined herself to eat healthy choices, yet can eat some treats without going overboard. She has disciplined herself to run, even when she is having a bad day and doesn't want to. It is this discipline that allowed her the ability to run 30 miles on her birthday for Chloe and to complete 7?-some marathons. She disciplines herself to use her "Dave Ramsey" budget envelopes. It is this discipline that allows her and her hubby to be generous to others. She goes to bed earlier than others to get her sleep even when others do not. She wakes up early to consistently complete her bible study. She fasts and prays for friends and family and the church. It is this discipline that explains why she has dear friends that go to her when they know they need someone who will pray on their behalf. She is trained, she is strong, and she has good self-control. All in all she rocks and we are jealous of her. Now before we talk about the ills of being jealous---let's just agree it is a healthy jealousy. A jealousy that inspires rather than an evil jealousy that causes bitterness. A jealousy that instills one to be like her as she tries to imitate Jesus (kind of like Paul in 1 Corinthians 11:1) or as Cass says as she "oozes Jesus"---whom by the way is very disciplined as evidenced through the scriptures. So even though we razz you Missy, please know it is out of sincere hope that some day we will be like you. Thank you for being my friend and encouragement and inspiration.

31 Days: Day 18

How to be disciplined about anything

Although some may assume the opposite to be true discipline is actually freedom. The more disciplined you are the easier it is to stay that way. Stephen Covey said “the undisciplined are slaves to moods, appetites and passions”. Self-discipline is dependent on the courage to go against your moods, appetites and passions.
It is discipline that causes you to:
*Exercise even though you are a bit tired
*Say no to another biscuit
*Get off the couch to do a task even though you don’t want to

Discipline is relevant to every area of our lives: fitness, food, habits, work, study, housework, cooking, spirituality and hobbies. Seeing discipline in others is motivating. I love how disciplined my husband is – it’s a really attractive quality.

I remember when I was living at home and working 18 hour days, I would be up without fail at 6:30am for a run followed by loads of sit ups on my bedroom floor. It made me feel great one day when my younger sister walked past and said “gosh you are good Allison”.She was impressed that everyday I was doing my workout. I started to notice I was really disciplined. Another measure of discipline I have is on nights I’m sooooo tired and had a long day I’d rather not floss my teeth after brushing. That might sound gross, but I figure missing one day isn’t that bad. But then my disciplined mind says“it only takes two seconds - toughen up” and I do it. Then I feel chuffed for doing it, because it’s the right thing to do, even when I’d rather be lazy.

If you want to be disciplined to reach your goals spend some time figuring out the ‘why’ of your goals:
* Why do you want to achieve that particular thing?
* How will it make you feel?
* What will you gain from it?
* What will achieving it say about you?
When you have got enough ‘whys’ that really excite you discipline should come naturally. Then raise your standards. Expect more from yourself. Know you can do better and be more. When you live at the level of your new standard long enough you’ll forget about any extra effort it takes, and you will start noticing “I am disciplined”!

Posted by Allison O'Neill----find it HERE

Do you have enough "whys"? I thought that was a very interesting point.

I've always said--I guess I don't want to lose weight because otherwise I would do it. I would want to do the things that would help me lose weight. Therefore, I must not really want it as bad as I think I do. Guess I don't have enough "whys" yet. Something to think about......

31 Days: Day 16

So this is the half way point of the month---you would think I would be so disciplined in everything right? I'm hardly even disciplined in writing my blog entries. So I am struggling with even things to write on the topic. Again, I can come up with more that I am not disciplined in rather than what I am disciplined in. Which brings me to tonight's post---the one I am actually an expert in: How to Remain Undisciplined.

1. Be Lazy.

2. Don't make any goals.

3. Don't keep your commitments.

4. Become easily distracted.

5. Make excuses.

6. Don't develop routines..... i.e. stay up late, don't get enough sleep, so that you are to tired to meet your goals

7. Have no self-control

8. Choose feelings rather than what you know to be true.

9. Don't tell any friends about your goals.

10. Do what you want when you want.

Oh Yeah--- Numbers 11-100: Have kids!!!

Ouch! This list sounds like me. How about you? Sounds like I am really disciplined about being undisciplined. :( Please comment and share what your obstacle to being disciplined is.....

31 Days: Day 12-15

Well I have been a big failure in being disciplined this week. I guess if I still finished strong then 84 % of the month would be good....right? Exhaustion, concert with hubby, more exhaustion, losing voice/continuing to not feel well, fun family day, game night with friends, more exhaustion. OK those are my excuses. OR just repeat last post about Romans 7!

31 Days: Day 11.

Not feeling too original today, but here are the verses that sum up my life right after a small stanza that sums up the verses..... :)

Discipline

by Deb Nelson

I don't want to live my life in sin,
But, I'm having a hard time with discipline.
I do the things I don't want to do,
And don't do the things I want to...................

FROM THE MESSAGE:

Romans 7 ^17-20But I need something more! For if I know the law but still can't keep it, and if the power of sin within me keeps sabotaging my best intentions, I obviously need help! I realize that I don't have what it takes. I can will it, but I can't do it. I decide to do good, but I don't really do it; I decide not to do bad, but then I do it anyway. My decisions, such as they are, don't result in actions. Something has gone wrong deep within me and gets the better of me every time.

^21-23It happens so regularly that it's predictable. The moment I decide to do good, sin is there to trip me up. I truly delight in God's commands, but it's pretty obvious that not all of me joins in that delight. Parts of me covertly rebel, and just when I least expect it, they take charge.

²⁴I've tried everything and nothing helps. I'm at the end of my rope. Is there no one who can do anything for me? Isn't that the real question?

²⁵The answer, thank God, is that Jesus Christ can and does. He acted to set things right in this life of contradictions where I want to serve God with all my heart and mind, but am pulled by the influence of sin to do something totally different.

FROM THE NIV:

Romans 7: ¹⁸ I know there is nothing good in my sinful nature. I want to do what is good, but I can't. ¹⁹ I don't do the good things I want to do. I keep on doing the evil things I don't want to do. ²⁰ I do what I don't want to do. But I am not really the one who is doing it. It is sin living in me.

²¹ Here is the law I find working in me. When I want to do good, evil is right there with me. ²² Deep inside me I find joy in God's law. ²³ But I see another law working in the parts of my body. It fights against the law of my mind. It makes me a prisoner of the law of sin. That law controls the parts of my body.

²⁴ What a terrible failure I am! Who will save me from this sin that brings death to my body? ²⁵ I give thanks to God. He will do it through Jesus Christ our Lord.

So in my mind I am a slave to God's law. But in my sinful nature I am a slave to the law of sin.

31 Days of Discipline: Day 10

Well it is actually still Sunday (Day 9) but tomorrow I am going to practice the discipline of fasting. Now I know normally you aren't suppose to broadcast the fact that you are fasting, but I share this for two reasons: 1) our entire church was asked to fast following our 30 days of life.hope. and purpose. and pray for our church and community. 2) Because of my new job and some blood sugar issues at times, I have decided to fast from electronics tomorrow. Did you realize that food was not the only thing someone could fast from? I am addicted to facebook, email, and Prison Break at this moment....so it should be a good fast tomorrow evening and a great time of prayer. I will rejoin you on Day 11. I am definitely not disciplined in fasting, but it is a discipline I am making more of an effort to do when a major need arises and it surprised me the last time I did a 3-day fast, how God sustained me through it. Why I should be surprised of God's strength I have no clue, but it was a major learning experience. This coming from a girl who previously was excited that she was pregnant, so she didn't have to miss one meal at CIY as a youth coach. Needless to say, I know now that in any discipline if you ask God to see you through it and invite Him there with you, you will have more power to do what you never thought you could do. Have you practiced the discipline of fasting?

31 Days of Discipline: Day 9

So it seems like I am only admitting to the areas in which I lack discipline---but honestly it seems the scales tip that way. I believe tonight's discipline talk is brought to you by my 8 year old daughter. My bible study/scripture memorization is anything but consistent. We are off and on, cold and hot, and so forth. Lately, I have been getting on to Eden for not studying her Bible Bowl daily like she is suppose to. She wanted to be part of Beginner's Bible Bowl and with that comes a lot of responsibility. She is really gung ho about it, until she has to study every night. Sound like anyone else? For me, it is like daughter, like mother. Well tonight my 8 year old daughter---who is emotional at best---started crying after our prayer time lamenting about "not feeling connected to God." She mentioned being distracted---and these distractions kept her from her studying. So I mentioned that dad and I get distracted as well and that perhaps we could all turn off the TV and study together. Side note: Praise the Lord that even when we don't feel connected to God, we are never alone. He never leaves us or forsakes us. I did tell Eden this truth. Now in all honesty, it was kind of sad and I can admit, she can take one thing and be pretty dramatic about it---but if I am really honest---it was rather convicting. What are your distractions that keep you from being disciplined?

31 Days: Day 8/Laundry, Lack of Discipline, and a Giveaway!

**** OUR FIRST GIVEAWAY ****

So I missed Day 7's blog. Had a football game to attend to watch my Eden Dawn dance in the pre-game and then my hubby and I went and watched Courageous. It was a great evening. It also marked our 3 month waiting-t0- adoptiversary. We will probably be waiting for several months----so brace yourself. But meanwhile I am thinking about doing giveaways from here on out. I have to be disciplined enough to get them together. :)

Speaking of discipline---one of the areas where I am least disciplined is laundry and reading. I use to love to read, and I really want to....but as a young mom, I find myself so tired and I give up and fall asleep. But I do read online.....so although I have not read the book in the giveaway out of the spin cycle, I have read the author's blog (www.jenhatmaker.com)and simply LOVE her writing. She tells you like it is and loves God and His people and is funny, at the same time pierces the heart. I highly recommend you follow her. Her most recent post Fake Family even discusses her laundry, which seemed apropos given the current giveaway items. The friends of mine who have read this book all love it. I haven't heart a bad thing about it. The back says "Hatmaker takes the words and deeds of Jeus, adds the humor of a young mom's life, and offers messages of grace and encouragement. Covering areas such as worry, marriage, priorities, money, and the comparison trap, this dynamic Bible teacher brings Jesus's message alive in short, to the point devotionals for your busy life. This is a devotional for you--the woman inside the mom--the Bible student, the learner, the world changer. So put aside that to-do list for a moment and discover the ways Jesus can lighten your mother load." I also just recieved a copy of the book so perhaps the winner can keep me accountable/disciplined enough to read the whole thing. :)

Oh, did I mention she is an adoptive mom? Her family just welcomed home two beautiful children from Ethiopia and do they have a testimony about it. My hubby and one of my BFF's hubby's laugh at us because we act like Jen Hatmaker is one our best friends. We are friends on Facebook---doesn't that make us BFF's? Anyways, us moms have got to stick together to encourage one another, whether it is disciplining our child, our own self-discipline, our bible accountability, discipling our children, or our laundry, whatever the reason. This is true whether we have adopted children or biological (OR both).

Back to the laundry.....with the book, I am throwing in a Cotton Laundry Bag (22" x 34"). It is a draw cord laundry bag w/ laundry instructions on the front. Perfect for traveling, camping or a child about to head away for college, so they are sure to bring home their laundry for you to do, mom, or a holiday gift.

To win this small, but first and delightful giveaway: #1 please leave a comment (ON THE BLOG) about the area you feel least disciplined in (that way I can be encouraged-lol) or what is your amazing system that keeps you disciplined in the area of laundry. #2 Become a follower of Strickland Sentiments and comment below that you did so. #3 Share this post/our blog on facebook, or any other spot that seems cool and leave an additional comment for each entry. We will draw randomly on Thursday evening 11:00 (right after we return from our Steven Curtis Chapman/Show Hope concert!!!)

Thanks for listening.

31 Days: Day 6.

When does one know they are "disciplined"? I am not 100% sure of this answer. However, in my First Place reading today, I read about striving for internal accountability (ironically I was reading about Emotional Eating while drinking my Free Route 44 Dr. Pepper w/ lemon because I was tired and "felt" like I needed it).

Anyways I had never heard the term "internal accountability". The book stated "as you make the changes for which you have sought accountability, you will begin to develop the ability to process decisions and avoid temptations on your own. There will come a time when your internal accountability system includes prayer, relying on God for direction, commitment to folloiwng Him and His Word, and the ability to hold yourself accountable. Once you do this on a consistent basis, you probably won't need external accountability and can release your partners from their responsibility."

I am trying to remember when I have became internally accountable in something--anything. I guess mundane things like brushing your teeth, or going to work, etc. causes one to be internally accountable. But even to be accountable to work, I must use an external tool like an alarm clock. Unless you are Kramer, and have an "internal alarm clock". But that's a whole 'nother story.

So what areas are you internally accountable or disciplined in? I honestly am still trying to be internally accountable in many areas: my bible study, my prayer life, my exercise, my eating habits, and the list goes on.

And how long if any did it take you to go from accountability partners/trainer/mentor/peer/nutritionist to being internally accountable?

Thanks for listening.

31 Days: Day 5

To be honest, it is only day 5 and I must keep writing on topic. I had some deep thought earlier in the day, but it was fleeting. Alas, all I can think to write is: I hate discipline!

Hopefully with some good rest and no evening responsibilites tomorrow, I can be a bit more chipper about discipline and it's supposed benefits. :)

31 Days: Day 4.

****Some really great quotes on self-discipline/determination by a lot of people I do not know. :)****


"It's not that some people have willpower and some don't. It's that some people are ready to change and others are not."
- James Gordon

"Nothing really worth having comes quickly and easily. If it did, I doubt that we would ever grow."
- Eknath Easwaran

"If you have made mistakes, even serious ones, there is always another chance for you. What we call failure is not the falling down, but the staying down."
- Mary Pickford

"Willingness is essential in any initiation or in making any dream come true. "I can't" often means "I won't." You can change "I won't" to "I will" with will power."
- Marcia Wieder

"Gongfu is an ancient Chinese term describing work/devotion/effort that has been successfully applied over a substantial period of time, resulting in a degree of mastery in a specific field. Although the term is synonymous in the West with martial arts (though it is most over rendered Kung Fu), it is equally applicable to calligraphy, painting, music, or other areas of endeavor."
- Andy James

"We all have dreams. But in order to make dreams come into reality, it takes an awful lot of determination, dedication, self-discipline, and effort."
- Jessie Owens

"Any significant long-term change requires long-term practice, whether that change has to do with playing the violin or learning to be a more open, loving person. We all know people who say that they have been permanently changed by experiences of a moment or a day or a weekend. But when you check it out you'll generally discover that those who ended up permanently
changed had spent considerable time preparing for their life-changing experience or had continued diligently practicing the new behavior afterward."
- Michael Murphy and George Leonard

"A thousand mile journey begins with one step."
- Lao Tse

31 Days: Day 3.

It is funny once you commit to something how God continues to bring up the same topic in your head. One of the things I have not been so disciplined in is my First Place Bible study---I've been off and on. But today I opened up my study ( a few days late) and what do I read? 2 Timoth 2:3-7:

"Endure hardship with us like a good soldier of Christ Jesus. No one serving as a soldier gets involved in civilian affairs---he wants to please his commanding officer. Similarly, if anyone competes as an athlete, he does not receive the victor's crown unless he competes according to the rules. The hardworking farmer should be the first to receive a share of the crops. Reflect on what I am saying, for the Lord will give you insight into all this."

The bible study goes on to explain these three metaphors. Paul uses them to help us understand how to live a Christian life. "Soldiers, athletes, and farmers discipline themselves to achieve their goals and expect results from their efforts. What are your goals for your Christian Life? What results do you expect?

By looking at these examples, it is easy to see that God desires us to be disciplined---to train like an athlete, to work hard like a farmer, to obey, serve, and please our commanding officer. The good news is he offers grace, not only that but is the Source of grace that strengthens us to be disciplined and to do the work needed.


So why discipline yourself? We discipline ourselves to achieve our goals and to see results. What results do you want to see? What is a specific action you can take to pursue these results?

***Disclaimer---I know I am preaching to the choir. I just read some of this today. Obviously I know some of it---but it is clear that I should be doing what God desires and I am ashamed to say I do not. God wants to see me disciplined enough to achieve my goals, even more so His goals and see results. Results that are surely to benefit His kingdom. I have been slapped in the face. I pray that I can take a bit of my own medicine and work on my own desire to be disciplined.

Do you have a desire to be disciplined?

31 Days....Day 2.

I chose this old font because it is a whimsical and fun font---wouldn't you agree? I mean what is not fun about "Discipline"?

So just to make sure I was on the right page I looked up the definition of the word:

dis·ci·pline.
noun \ˈdi-sə-plən\


1: punishment


2 obsolete: instruction


3 : a field of study


4: training that corrects, molds, or perfects the mental faculties or moral character


5 a: control gained by enforcing obedience or order b: orderly or prescribed conduct or pattern of behavior c: self-control

6 : a rule or system of rules governing conduct or activity




So just to be clear on what I struggle with is discipline as defined by self-control. Let's face it. I don't got it.

Another way I look at the term discipline is making yourself do something you don't necessarily want to do so that some day you can do things without having to make yourself---b/c it has at that point become ahabit. So questions for you my readers: What thing are you making yourself do so that at some point it will become second nature or habitual to you? And how are you making yourself do something you initially didn't want to do? Can discipline be a fun word? These are the burning questions I have--

31 Days......

So I just read a challenge about writing on the same topic for 31 days of October. It is going to be a challenge, but immediately I knew what topic I would write on: the big D-word. Discipline. I can recall starting my journals every six months like this---"Dear Lord, Please forgive me for my lack of discipline......" and so forth and so forth. I have written about the topic before. Discipline seems to be my nemesis and it is for this reason that I plan on writing about it for the next 31 days. I have no idea what that means.....will I write about things that I want to be disciplined in? Will I write about the ways I have been wrong with the idea of discipline? Good ways to discipline? How God discplines his children? Even I do not know. But that is why it is a challenge. Day 1 done. Now if only I can be discplined enough to complete 30 more days......

***Also, I hope to get a cool pic for this series and maybe link you to all the other 31 Day blogs....but that might have to wait till tomorrow.